Bigger is not always better. Bigger churches bring with them bigger budgets and bigger programs and bigger overhead and bigger staff needs. And with it comes bigger headaches and especially a bigger disconnect between leadership and the people who they serve.
I am not anti-growth when it comes to faith communities. Hear me out. I am not in favor of big churches that are so big they now resemble a religious franchise rather than a spiritual home. The use of corporate language such as "worship specialist" or "executive pastor" is concerning to me. Why not just really put it out there and call your church God-Mart?
Small is better. Leaders are accessible, people are visible to one another. Transparency and honest, authentic relationships become the norm rather than the exception. That is, if your small church is healthy and nurturing. Toxic faith and toxic leadership is no respector of size.
Last week I was confronted by two personal incidents of poor judgment. Not a catastrophe. But they were lapses of judgment in areas of responsibility that I have at The Bridge (my small church). Because we are such a tight-knit community, Deborah, a friend of mine as well as one of the pastors of our church, was a mere phone call away. No secretary to screen my call. No business hours to pay attention to. I called my friend, who is also a pastor in my church, and asked for guidance. Because our community is small, the leadership is accessible.
In the other incident, I was contacted swiftly and directly and led into a discussion about the situation and how to proceed. This involved two other leaders in our church. Again, accessible. Transparent. Direct. This is spiritual community which is really friendship in the climate of faith.
I know that many people thrive in Big Church. I am not one of them. I need the companionship of a group of people who not only know my name but also know my kids and my husband, my whole family. I thrive in an environment where my personal weaknesses are not held against me. This bolsters my willingness to be open and honest and avoid living dishonestly on Sunday. My friend Erin says that church taught her how to lie. The family of faith known as The Bridge is teaching me how to be honest.
Small is faster. Closer. Able to navigate quickly through tight places. Like a small boat along side a cruise ship, the little vessel can get to places that the Titanic never could. I know the reverse is true. I would never cross the ocean in a dingy if I could avoid it. But I would never go fishing or rafting on a humongous boat either.
Small is sexy. It arouses me to let my guard down, to come out of hiding and show my true colors, the invisible part of me that I fret about. The intimacy that small can bring is impossible for me in a crowded place like a Big Church. I just can't manage it. I know how to perform and Do Church in a big house of faith. But I cannot let my flaws bleed out. It might mess up the carpet.
And here's the other thing: because I embrace the wisdom of small communities and all the little details that make our church a family-like atmosphere, it helps me value the small things in other places of my life.
The sexiness of being and doing small now has a big place in my heart.
I am not anti-growth when it comes to faith communities. Hear me out. I am not in favor of big churches that are so big they now resemble a religious franchise rather than a spiritual home. The use of corporate language such as "worship specialist" or "executive pastor" is concerning to me. Why not just really put it out there and call your church God-Mart?
Small is better. Leaders are accessible, people are visible to one another. Transparency and honest, authentic relationships become the norm rather than the exception. That is, if your small church is healthy and nurturing. Toxic faith and toxic leadership is no respector of size.
Last week I was confronted by two personal incidents of poor judgment. Not a catastrophe. But they were lapses of judgment in areas of responsibility that I have at The Bridge (my small church). Because we are such a tight-knit community, Deborah, a friend of mine as well as one of the pastors of our church, was a mere phone call away. No secretary to screen my call. No business hours to pay attention to. I called my friend, who is also a pastor in my church, and asked for guidance. Because our community is small, the leadership is accessible.
In the other incident, I was contacted swiftly and directly and led into a discussion about the situation and how to proceed. This involved two other leaders in our church. Again, accessible. Transparent. Direct. This is spiritual community which is really friendship in the climate of faith.
I know that many people thrive in Big Church. I am not one of them. I need the companionship of a group of people who not only know my name but also know my kids and my husband, my whole family. I thrive in an environment where my personal weaknesses are not held against me. This bolsters my willingness to be open and honest and avoid living dishonestly on Sunday. My friend Erin says that church taught her how to lie. The family of faith known as The Bridge is teaching me how to be honest.
Small is faster. Closer. Able to navigate quickly through tight places. Like a small boat along side a cruise ship, the little vessel can get to places that the Titanic never could. I know the reverse is true. I would never cross the ocean in a dingy if I could avoid it. But I would never go fishing or rafting on a humongous boat either.
Small is sexy. It arouses me to let my guard down, to come out of hiding and show my true colors, the invisible part of me that I fret about. The intimacy that small can bring is impossible for me in a crowded place like a Big Church. I just can't manage it. I know how to perform and Do Church in a big house of faith. But I cannot let my flaws bleed out. It might mess up the carpet.
And here's the other thing: because I embrace the wisdom of small communities and all the little details that make our church a family-like atmosphere, it helps me value the small things in other places of my life.
The sexiness of being and doing small now has a big place in my heart.
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It is one of the fastest growing churches in South Carolina. They open new buildings in new cities nearby,....called "campuses" and cater to telling pastors nationwide, how to become massive too.
Here is the blurb from one of the pastors description of HIM:
Tony Morgan is a pastor and the Chief Strategic Officer at NewSpring Church where he develops creative solutions for communications, technology and NewSpring Ministries--the church's ministry that equips other church leaders.
Pastors are attending to hear Perry preach "Perryisms". Perry is boss, so he is even loftier than a Chief Strategic Officer.
This is a church where you do what you are told, and there is a low, or no tolerence for dissent.
The new seminar sold out immediately for 3,000 PASTORS to attend workshops and learn mega life too. Now, I read at the venue that 350 MORE spots can be sold in a building nearby (with a $20 discount) because Perry is live, but on a screen).
Um, if you are going to watch a screen, why not get a tape and view it at home?
Well, you also get to go to mini seminars with the other 3,000 or 3,350 pastors.
God Mart is a nice title, but it is really getting closer to Super Bowl hoopla on Sunday at church.
I have attended, small, medium, and large and mega, and anything in between.
The larger the church gets, the more people you know over time. But as I told my daughter when we left a mega, "we know everyone and no one here".
We had been there 9 years and saw many come and go.
There is always a new face, greet them, and give them an audience with the pastor with cookies included. Many smiles for a few minutes before service, then waay too loud music for 20 minutes.
Sometimes 1,2, or 3 collections are done.
When my mom died, a single person came to the funeral home from that church we attended for 9 years. One!
While speaking to me by the casket, she asked about my daughter. It came out that my daughter had CALLED her to come to the funeral home.
Out of thousands of people we knew for 9 years, one came to a funeral home....not the funeral....and only because she was called by a kid.
I have never been further from God than when i was there. Yet, at the time, it FELT like God was right next to me. Those are feelings, not God. And the feelings are created. They are not right or wrong, they just are.
Now I look church to church to church to find God again. He is in none I have attended in the past 13 years.
No mom, no God, and a wicked winter, as well as a few betrayals, have frozen my soul.
I think my small church is going to end up just me, and God.
Thank you for this contribution to this idea of Bigger Being Better. We are living in the age of Wal-Mart sized megachurches that are very glitzy and Type-A, and mistaken for status in the kingdom of God.
Greatness is to be found in obscurity, not notoriety. Humility is the tried and true posture of kingdom-style success.
I don't know anything about the church you describe here, yet I recognize the template. No thank you. Not for me or most people that I know.
I unapologetically predict that megachurches will fragment down into smaller tribes within the next 25 years.
Thanks for stopping by, Keystone. I'm sorry, though not surprised, to hear of the lack of response to your mother's death in your then megacommunity.
I love my small, rowdy church, The Bridge. When my best friend was killed people were at my door before the day was over, and in the days to follow. My entire faith community knew about our family's tragic loss. I felt cared for.
I hope you can find a small church to call home someday, but yeah, meanwhile, keep it real between you and God and other Christ followers. You are the Church. And so am I. Jesus had quite a humble definition of what constituted a gathering worthy of his presence, now didn't he? I love that he is that way!
Small is BIG in the kingdom of God!
one of the reasons i love the bridge (not that this is an advertisement for our scrappy church) is because i can't get away with shit...or being a shit. we can have conflict -- and know that conflict can be a really positive thing when people love each other through it and are able to say "ok, that was rough, i still love you and we are good." i SO SO SO SO appreciate that!! i am someone who struggles with feeling unwanted, so confrontation and conflict are extremely difficult for me -- i am terrified a friend will ditch me over a misunderstanding....i love that, at the bridge we can come to each other and have conflict and still walk away friends....even stronger friends. its community.
i had a really rough day on tuesday and before i knew it, someone from the church (one of the pastors) was bringing geoff and i dinner. i didn't even have to ask...she just provided something for us.
i think if more communities grabbed a hold of the concept that we need to get off our tushes and love people, even in ways we think are insignificant, we would see more people coming to church and knowing who jesus is.....
love you pam!!
thank you crystal for being who you are. I adore you! And yes, I am totally proud of the small community, big heartedness of The Bridge. It is tight-knit, though, not just because of size but because of honest, compassionate care. I am thrilled to be raising my kids through their adolescent years in such a house of faith.
Love ya back, girl! We must HANG together soon, as in next week.....!